Is it ok to find friends online when your married?

ok something happend the other day and my hubby is guilty of this too, i was mad, but i started to get over it. well i thought two can play that came kinda thing.he used to go on myspace and hundreds of personel sites. it really got under my skin. so then suposedly he stopped, but then in his email he was talking to some girl through his phone i guess its called mocospace, and i let it go. so then i started to look online and find other men to talk to as friends, and thats what he told me the first time when he was talkin to those girls. to him he started hiding things from me, like his cellphone and he wouldnt let me use it to call my parents or something. so then i just started talking to people. so today he comes in my room and says "i saw who you were talking to on blackplanet", and i was like "so, you did it too" we are kinda young so dont say anything stupid. i said " they are friends". then he was like stay off that site,u dont want me to start? do you?" what does he mean?

Is it ok to find friends online when your married?
sounds like a couple of school children.
Reply:You know, in the wrong hands, the internet can really ruin a marriage. What the two of you are doing is really crossing the boundaries. These people shouldn't be calling him nor should you be receiving calls from these people. It is a form of cheating in my opinion.
Reply:I have met many people online, male and female, but nothing sexual or anywhere near what could be considered cheating. My wife and I have been married over 12 years. Most of the people I know online are other guys, and sports is basically what brings us together. The same can be said of the women in our groups. No hanky panky, and my wife knows all about them. In fact, she likes reading our message boards, because she gets a good laugh out of half the stuff we talk about. There's nothing wrong if your intentions are innocent, and you are completely honest about what's going on.
Reply:Sunshyne. My recommendation is to sit down and have a serious talk with your husband when the situation has diffused a bit. Trying to sort out this issue in the heat of the moment will only cause more conflict. Wait for an opportune time, and then start out bay acknowledging your part in the matter. Apologize for going online. (In the future don't try to get revenge it will only complicate things). After offering a sincere apology, express to him how much it bothers you that he's online making friends with other women. Let him know that it makes you feel unloved. Then sit down with him to set up guidelines for the future. My personal opinion is that you both should,as much as is possible, eliminate isolated contact with persons of the opposite sex now that you are married. It only creates an environment for temptation (and is clearly causing conflict in your marriage). But set up boundaries that are appropriate for you. I would also recommend marriage counseling of some sort. I suspect there are some root issues at hand that haven't been disclosed in this question that need to be dealt with. Clearly you love you're husband and it hurts you to see him interact with other women in a way that could potentially compromise his love for you. I'm sure he feels the same way about you and your interaction with men. Strive to love one another!
Reply:you both sound like you are in Jr. high school, what a couple of babies, neither one of you is ready to be married and seeing as he won't go to counseling then you 2 need to get away from each other before something bad happens, grow up and please don't have any children as you 2 would probably be acting younger than your children, and their are enough babies having babies right now
Reply:How old are you for cryen out loud disconnect your internet and get a life.I so hope you dont have off spring.
Reply:both of you stay off line a love each other
Reply:well, this all sounds kinda childish,but you did say you were both young.


If a couple is married or just living together as boyfriend/girlfriend, I dont see any problems with going online and talking to people as friends - as long as both people are straight forward and honest with eachother and with the person on the other end,but it sounds like your partner has been doing more.


sometimes its easier to talk to a complete stranget online and tell them how your feeling and get there opinions and advise


next time he says something about "starting" just tell him its time to grow up !


come right out and tell him how you feel,and if your dead set that your going to leave him - then tell him that you are leaving, and do it.


the fact that he wouldnt go to counceling shows that he doesnt want to work on things


get that job together soon or go to a friends or family members house to stay until you can get up on your feet

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